Bad Timing

"Just when I thought I'd seen the last of you
 you come here scratchin' at my door
 your pain and anger's in the howling dark
 of every corridor I walk..."

After my previous blog 'Nervous Anticipation', it was ironic that on all days possible, my ex-girlfriend chose World Cancer Day to get in touch after three long months of total silence.
As I stated then, I offered to give everything up to be with her and her young girls, only to be rejected and told that it was for the best for me to move on.
Reluctantly, that is exactly what I've been trying to do although at times it still hurts like hell.

The specifics of the communication will forever remain private ~ gentlemen don't kiss and tell ~ but the emotions and feelings inevitably came flooding back, as the past was raked up.
What ultimately confuses me and messes me up is that the general message from her was that she misses me, she still thinks of me, but she rejected me because she wanted me to move on.
But this leaves me with one simple question...so why contact me now?

I've spent the past week comforting a mate going through some troubles of his own, and trying to be strong for him, which has proved tough sometimes as I can draw comparisons between our two situations.
On hearing from my ex-girlfriend the temptation was to wallow in self pity and crawl into the bottom of a bottle... but I've been there and done that, so not again.

Fortunately, I have the charity event in April to keep my thoughts occupied, and I'm extremely happy to report that I've nearly hit my target already! A big thank you goes out to all those who've donated so far.
Please find my link to my 'Just Giving' donations page below:

http://www.justgiving.com/SteveMuskett27010

So the cause goes on...
I spent my troubled weekend walking 15 miles plus, on both Saturday and Sunday.
I must confess that my legs are aching a wee bit as I write this blog, but a little pain is a small price to pay for what I'm setting out to achieve. In a few months time, I will need to walk on average 20 miles per day for five consectutive days, so I still have plenty of time to condition myself and maintain my fitness.

The South Downs Way - 100 miles from Winchester to Eastbourne - April 23rd to 27th
in aid of Cancer Research UK.

Finally, thanks to the few close friends that I've confided in, and please be assured that I will never sink to the depths of a few years ago ~ excuse the rather ironic pun in the circumstances, but...
'what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger'.

Ramblin' Steve